Her hair is dark, her lips are blood red, and her eyes are even darker than her hair. A woman of great class, one would say. Her hips do the talking for her, wide enough to entice and sufficient to sustain the control over men she already has. She is seductive, a liar; she is the demise of a good man. Even though her name is unknown, it makes it more mysterious and enchanting. But many will whisper that her name is Femme Fatale. 

In the Oxford Languages definition, Femme Fatale is a seductive woman who uses her seduction to her advantage. A woman who knows that her grasp on men is far too firm than anything else. But is there more to that general definition? Just a woman who uses her seductiveness to woo men over and get what she wants? There is so much more to the femme fatale. She can have ambition and want to pursue her dreams. Instead of her dreams being the object of attention, her looks and charm are often the center of attention. In many cases of the femme fatale, the woman is described as evil with awful intentions. This particular sub-genre is rooted in the patriarchy. Stories with this sub-genre try to teach that the woman involved should be punished for her doings. One might counteract, claiming this is just an issue of fictional writers, but this problem is effective in the real world.

 In the biblical and notoriously noted story, Adam and Eve, a serpent tricks Eve into eating the forbidden fruit. During this scene, Eve also shares the idea with her husband, Adam, who has every right to deny this idea but chooses not to. When Adam indulged in this idea, he and his wife realized his nakedness. When God scolds them, Adam blames “the woman God brought him.” Although both parties indulged in things they shouldn’t have, it seemed to be Eve who was thrown under the bus. Even in today’s society, Eve is blamed and seen as the reason for this dilemma by some. It is not to say that she is not the reason for the issue; it is to ask why people are so quick to blame her. Why was Adam so quick to blame Eve? His first thought should have been that they both made a grave mistake rather than she tempted him and is to blame.Women are often blamed for things that they either had no part in or partial blame for.

When men condemn women, the most common reason is that she was using her seductiveness, and that they could not control themselves. This puts men in a barbaric box and gives the sense that men cannot control themselves. Indeed, this over-sexualization of women is showcased in media, workspaces, schools, and sadly, children. 

Sexuality and femininity are two sides of a sharp sword. On one side, women are seen as sexual beings and are to be desired. Conversely, it is a shame for a woman to use her sexuality to her own benefit. In spaces that include women, they are often subjected to unwanted attention. In places like schools and work, dress codes are placed for more formal dressing. But, to many people, dress codes are set aside for women. Many head positions in these settings say, “We do not want our peers to be tempted.” It is important to note that schools and workforces have every right to desire formal dressing, but it becomes an issue when women lose experience and crucial hours due to the dress code. The un-centered attention is the fault of the woman instead of the person who cannot control themselves.

 In my own experience as a girl in the academic world, there have been times when I have played with my hair while listening to a lesson, and a male peer has turned around and put his input on my hair. One has stated that they prefer one way of me wearing my hair to another because it makes me look better. Of course, this unwanted comment led us to bicker back and forth quietly. When the teacher became enlightened to the situation, she made it very clear that I was distracting my male peers and should not be playing “beauty school” during class. Even with my young and infantile explanation that I wasn’t playing with my hair in a destructive way, but it was more of fidgeting, it was still my fault. I was at fault because how could he pay attention when I was enticing him with the twirling of my hair? It was an awakening for me at an age so formative, a feminine fatality. 

The femme fatale archetype would use the patriarchy to their advantage instead of being a victim. Many fictional characters of this archetype argue with and challenge their male counterparts. Women in the real world who adhere to this identity can be ridiculed and seen as too loud and annoying. Even other women see this identity as a nuisance rather than an act of arguing against the ideologies that misogyny perpetuates. 

In the reality of a patriarchy-centered world, many women and girls focus their worth on what they can offer. It is times like that where the phrase I coined, “I envy the male child from the kitchen window,” plays in effect. Many women ask, “How will you marry if you do not …?” “When will you lose weight?” “ When will your hair be done?” All questions focus on outward appearance. Many young girls and women envy their male counterparts and wish to be respected and treated with similar reactions that men are rewarded with when their ideas are showcased. A femme fatale utilizes these questions to be perceived as powerful. It is endearing to know that an archetype of a woman will use her sources for her fairness. Unfortunately, this is not the reality for most women and girls. 

This mindset can cause issues when women are killed for intimate reasons. Using their physical attributes to attain desires can be seen as tricking and a reason for them to be killed. Cases of women murdered for saying no or “leading a man on” have been very prevalent. Femicide is an unfortunate depiction of a feminine fatality. During a study in 2020 by the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime, forty-seven thousand women and girls were killed by intimate partners or family members. This data concludes that in 2020 a woman or girl was killed  every eleven minutes. Some of these victims were sex workers, people who were profiting from their physical attributes. Unfortunately for them, their punishment was murder. Family members even have murdered their female family members due to reasons that imply intimacy and unwanted attention. Still, with all this data, these women get blamed for their deaths. 

For example, sex workers are blamed for their demise because they chose their path. Sex work has risks and dangerous components but does not excuse murder. Sex workers do not deserve to perish in their chosen work settings, regardless of public opinion about them. As stated by UNODC, ‘In general terms, gender-related killings of women and girls are committed on the grounds of “gender-related factors such as the ideology of men’s entitlement and privilege over women, social norms regarding masculinity, and the need to assert male control or power, enforce gender roles, or prevent, discourage or punish what is considered to be unacceptable female behavior.”’ Concluding the idea that behaviors perceived as uncommon can lead to men feeling the need to control and hurt women because of social norms. Social norms are rooted in patriarchy. The patriarchy benefits men more than women but hurts both groups. Often men replace the tendency to cry or be vulnerable with violence, and anger destroys them rather than help them. The general idea of the patriarchy tells men that they should be rough and overbearing to adhere to masculinity. Women should be soft and submissive to adhere to femininity. The truth is that masculinity and femininity are up to the person themselves on how they choose to define it. The idea that men should be the ones in control and need to be the aggressor has led to a high amount of femicide. 

My perspective on the femicide of women and their treatment due to societal norms resides in the continent of North America when it is Africa that needs to have a voice as well. Regarding Africa, UNODC states, “ … It is in Africa that women and girls appear to be most at risk of being killed by their intimate partners or other family members. In 2020, the female intimate partner/family-related homicide rate in Africa was estimated at 2.7 per 100,000 female population, compared with 1.6 in Oceania, 1.4 in the Americas, 0.8 in Asia, and 0.7 in Europe”. Concerning Africa, specific ideas are different from Europe and the Americas. Many social norms are set in stone and it is hard to shift people away from these ideas. 

As a first-generation Nigerian American, I have had my chance to witness some ideologies that older African women accept. The older African women I have encountered have learned to accept the treatment meted out to them. Countless older African women have told me they do not want to subscribe to my “feminist wahala” { wahala ~ Nigerian pidgin for a problem or trouble} when I tell them they do not deserve to be treated that way. Older African women would rather suffer in their relationships than leave, leading to violence being overlooked and washed over. These women make it a point to make the lives of men easier. They cook all their meals, microwave lunch for work, and wash their clothes. They will even protect the very men who put their lives in danger because that is what their mothers told them to do. I have seen women tell other young women they must stay in violent marriages because leaving is far more embarrassing than being safe. Many women are pressured to get married, which leads them to be legally bonded to someone with evil intentions or becomes aggressive.

Family members will tell young girls to be quiet about their sexual assault or rape, especially if it is from a known male figure. Still, even in the faults of men, they are protected. A young girl wearing shorts would be shamed for her assault by an older male figure because she should have known better. Keywords are a young girl and a more senior male figure. Regardless of a little girl’s appearance, an older male should not be attracted to her. Plain and simple, but it isn’t simple. The protection of dangerous men neglects young girls and women. Even writing this, I am subconsciously wondering if this piece will come across as a male slander piece when it is not. I fear men will not read this because they feel they are being slandered when that should not bother me. At this point, the feelings of a person who will condone certain behaviors so critical to the safety of young girls do not matter. Nor is this piece an African hate piece. It is not a piece to condone the hatred of Africa or its issues. It is a piece to highlight the problems that are overlooked. 

I acknowledge my privilege in that, because of my location, I will not allow the mistakes of previous African women to be the mistakes of the future. The benefit that I do not have to fear being an outcast or losing my life is one in a million. That is one blessing I am beyond grateful for, and I will use my privilege until it is no longer a privilege but a formality.  I will write, I will speak, and I will yell till everyone has heard the stories. If being part of the “feminist wahala” means the safety of those same women and future women, I will continue.

The biggest misconception growing when I mention all issues I have listed prior is that all men are the problem. No, all men are not the problem unless they allow their peers to continue the harmful lifestyles they are used to. Harmful lifestyles that cost women their lives and self-worth. The femme fatale mindset is a weapon of femininity used  in peculiar settings. Although primarily seen in fiction, the particular perspective can be construed as a way to target men and sexually destroy them. The femme fatale is an alluring gown that is worn in pure confidence and protection. The femme fatale dissects and seeks to ruin the occurrence of feminine fatality.